Con feels are hard to process. They'd be downright impossible to handle if we didn't have damn good safety equipment. That is, everyone I had intense scenes with knows about cut and break, knows they can walk out, and knows they are valued more than the experience. After the fact, I've had conversations that would be unsafe if not for safety protocol.
My particular job is pretty safe. There's respect on all sides.
I've been in jobs where there isn't. This isn't the place for details, but I once saw someone reduced to tears by the tyrannical dictates of her mentor/supervisor. At the time, I did nothing. And felt morally reprehensible for not. I didn't have the equipment -- I didn't have the moves at hand. I did mention, later, that this was unacceptable. But, I should have done something then.
I said my resolution for the year was to point out intimidation tactics when I saw them, and felt safe to do so.
So, here's a couple AW-style moves:
Move: Leadership
When you lead a meeting, start by saying "We all respect each other. Each of us is more important than this project, both to the company and to each other. If at any time, you do not feel it is safe for you to continue, the door is open. No questions will be asked, and you are welcome to rejoin when you feel safe. Similarly, if a situation is heading in a direction you cannot handle, please say "break" or "cut". If you say break, we will discuss the situation before continuing. If you say cut, the meeting is over until we feel it is safe to continue."
That is probably too long. Options for shorter? And yeah, this isn't quite what break and cut mean, and I am open for other ideas!
Move: Protection of others
When you are in a meeting, and the workplace is unsafe for someone other than yourself, say "Break. We need to discuss how
My concern with this move? It feels imperialistic as hell.
Lastly:
Move: Protection of self
When you are in a meeting and it is unsafe for you to continue, leave.
Chief concern here is folks who have to choose continued employment over safety. Fucking capitalism.
I'm going to start trying this, for a safe(r) working environment.
I'm interested in feedback, thoughts, criticisms, etc.
I have thoughts, but I need to not be in class to have time to share them.
ReplyDeleteI like having language for making sure folks feel they can contribute and they can make choices for feeling comfortable and valued.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I don't like that the option for being unsafe is leaving.
Because decisions are made by those who show up, so I feel like if someone left the meeting, it would just progress without them, and their concerns would never be addressed.
And also folks don't always have the ability to walk out of meetings with no repercussions. Especially if you're hosting the meeting!
I'd like to see something that holds all members of the meeting accountable for ensuring everyone feels comfortable about staying in the discussion, and everyone gets heard.
Maybe using the break/cut to make everyone pause and do a check-in with everyone about how comfortable they are with the discussions and decisions at hand?
It feels strange to think about this kind of discussion happening at the start of every meeting. I guess most of the meetings I go to have very clear expectations, based on previous meetings and interactions. I can't imagine bringing this up at one of our weekly meetings.
ReplyDeleteBut I have been in one or two meetings where something like this would be helpful. Say, at the start of a project when we're all figuring out what roles we'll be filling. Or at a particularly tense meeting with a client, when everyone knows there will be disagreements.
I would also try to mechanize contributions. That's something we do at some of our meetings, going round table without interruptions or criticisms to brainstorm ideas, then working together to prioritize those ideas without focusing on whose they were. But it adds to the culture of cooperation and mutual respect in the workplace, helping things go right, not just adding a safety net in case things go wrong.
Rowan Cota ok! This discussion will remain here, and remain public. If you want to send things in private, that's ok, too!
ReplyDeleteLex Larson You're right; what I envisioned but did not say is the moves go in order; the leader has the job of making sure everyone is OK. The protection of others anyone is free to use, and the Walkout move only occured if everything else is fucked. That is, if people aren't honoring your "cut", or if the leadership is not making it safe.
I think using break (which, probably, is brake, come to think of it. Oof!) as a time to check in makes perfect sense! someone says brake, and we go around the table making sure everyone is onboard.
Kevin Farnworth You are right, doing the intro at every staff meeting project meeting might not work. Maybe there's room for a shorter version: "This is a safe(r) space. If you feel unsafe, the door is always open. The Brake and Cut tools are available."
And yeah, really, the start of a big project or when it comes back after a hiatus.
A way to mechanize and formalize that we want to hear from everyone is also good! This is relatively simple in games, as we literally ask people questions and ponder the responses. Much harder to do when there is hierarchy.
William Nichols Right there with you on your distaste for Capitalism and hierarchy.
ReplyDeleteA thing I said yesterday that feels relevant to the discussion: I feel like I need to be able to say "Hey, I need some space from you" to my boss after spending most of a week with us in frequent contact over a big issue that had to be handled. But that's really not a thing we get to do in a professional environment.
ReplyDelete